Category Archives: Troubled relationships

19 Best Ways To Learn What Causes Divorce In Marriages

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Yes divorce is bad for the woman, bad for the man and extremely worse for the kids. Divorce and separation ruin and destroys all attributes of Love and marriage – caring, attachment, commitment, attraction and intimacy. Love is a commitment and partnership that brings two perfect strangers together and despite their differences they agree to love each other and live together till death do them part. Lovers often became too intoxicated in love and relationship that they tend to do anything and say whatever all in name of love to win their partners heart but soon after saying I do and the partnership progresses, true identity, true love and true self starts to emerge and then the lovers start to realize that it was only a wishful thinking. They start to realize that they have made life mistakes by committing to someone they are not compatible with and should not have been with at the first place.

RELATED:

Reasons for Divorce and Recollections of Premarital Couples

11 Most Common Reasons for Divorce

12 Most Common Reasons People Get Divorced

10 Most Common Reasons for Divorce

How Common is Divorce and What are the Reasons?

Causes of Divorce : Power of Two Marriage

The most common reasons for divorce

Why do people get divorced?



Reasons People Give for Divorce | Institute for Family Studies

The 10 Most Common Reasons People Get Divorced

The reality is that most marriages fail even before getting started. The couples just manage to hold on to the broken marriage just to keep their families and friends happy. Some couples who already had kids just hang on and pretend things are fine just make their children and their parents and friends happy and proud. The irony of it all is that some women actually do not intend to tie the nut with any man but only do so just to answer somebody’s family name and avoid the stigma of been called a single old maid. On the other hand, some men also do not intend to say I do with any woman but was forced to by his parents, friends and other social norms that made men enjoy the status of a family man or risk been called a loser. During the cause of research, I came across some reasons that contributed to what causes divorce in marriages and why couples should divorce to give peace a chance and start all over. I thought it wise to share opinion on them.

Studio Shot of female's hands holding broken heart

Top Reasons For Broken Marriages.

1. Desire to be independent – When couples blindly tie the nut without understanding the basic principles of marriage, the urge to be free again and get out of the mistake comes up shortly after saying I do.

2. Getting attracted to another person – To some couples, waking up in the morning seeing the same old face is very boring especially if there is no attraction in their relationship and soon after, one starts to get attracted to someone they meet in parties, office, street, online etc. When the love dies, attraction and every other thing dies with it.

3. Infidelity. When one partner is not satisfied sexually in bed, infidelity comes to play. He/she starts to look outside for sexual satisfaction and that means death to their marriage.

4. Less attracted to the person in a sexual way – When the love becomes so boring and weaknesses starts to pump up, couples become less attracted to each other even when naked. They loose interest in each other and making love becomes an obligation.

5. Lack of proper body maintenance – Soon after marriage, some couples stopped all basic hygiene and simple exercise and quickly became too fat and out of shape thinking after all they are already married and not in the dating process anymore but only to realize later that their partner is no longer interested in them.

6. Conflict in tastes and desires – Yes some couples are completely perfect strangers that should never be married at the first place. They have nothing in common when it comes to taste and even desire for any smallest thing in their house or anywhere. Some couples have high taste while others are low maintenance.

7. Continuous nagging – Yes, Some women are born sarcastic and keep nagging their husbands to extreme and some men are too hard and never satisfied of anything the wife does so both couples only found solace at their offices, with friends, etc and shortly their relationship hit rock and goes sour as they part ways.

8. Comparing the man or woman to others constantly – When there is dissatisfaction of any sought especially incompetent in bed, there will be urge to test something different and a partner starts to compare the other to someone they met at parties, social gathering, events etc. Such constant comparison will eventually compel the couple to try something different.

9. Addiction to alcohol or drugs – The darkest side of blind marriage is that some partners pretend to be cool and clean of every addiction just to win the love of other partner but it would not be long before true colors and perils starts to emerge, then other partner discovered that he/she married an alcoholic and drug addict. Love and relationship or rather marriage never thrive with an alcoholic and drug addict.

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10. Deterioration in the health of one spouse or suffering from incurable ailments like HIV – One of the unfortunate situations in marriage is when the health of the other partner deteriorates or suffering from incurable ailments. Though the agony of it is if the partner contacted the incurable ailment through solicited sex or drug usage then other partner has no choice but to pack his/her bags and say goodbye to the marriage irrespective of how strong it might seem to be.

11. Physical and mental abuse and exhibiting sadistic tendencies – Some men are really hard and has no soft spot for their wife. They go wild, furious and sadistic over every smallest thing and that tendency scares off his wife as she has no choice but to run for her life. Relatively, some women are born sarcastic and keep nagging their husbands to extreme to the extent that the only thing that stops them is a hot spank and some men really does that.

12. Impotency or inability to bear children – Well, this is something natural that comes out after marriage and some people cannot handle or bear it hence, the marriage collapse soon after it gets started. Most men likes to have children after marriage at least to prove and make their parents and families happy and women on the other hand likes to have active sexual life with their husband therefore, it becomes a big problem if the man is Impotent or the wife is not able to bear children.

13. We just fell out of love – When nothing seemed to be working sexually, believe it or not, couples fell out of love. Though they hide the feeling within themselves as they maybe ashamed to share it with families or friends.

14. He cheated – He cheated or she cheated, this is only an alibi by couples who’s relationship has failed internally and one partner looking for alternative way out. When there is no other proven fault to dump the relationship, one starts to accuse the other of cheating just to create an avenue to go test something new.

15. He lied about something – Who never lied about something. Can anyone tell me who never lied about something in the past. This is again an alibi purported when a couple finds someone new and wants to end his/her marriage in other to start a new love.

16. We were always fighting and realized we shouldn’t be together – Fighting is a result of unplanned marriage by two perfect strangers who shouldn’t be together at the firstt place but were blindfolded by first attractions. The differences should have been resolved before saying I do.

17. He wasn’t very ambitious when it came to his career – Again, this is not a point to consider when it comes to divorce or separation. This is only an alibi and part of a game plan just to get rid of the other partner because career ambition is something that could be fixed at any point of the relationship.

18. He didn’t get along with my friends and family – Love comes first before friends and family and he is not marrying your friends or your partner. This is just a mere alibi to leave your partner when the love is already doomed and heading no where.

19. Irreconcilable differences – Most couples claim that the reason they are divorcing is due to irreconcilable differences. I do not seem to buy that notion because based on above reasons, they are all reconcilable if the couples really want and love each other. Its only a matter of talking and forgiving each other of what ever they have done wrong. No one is perfect.

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SEE ALSO:

14 Top Reasons for Divorce – Oprah Magazine

The Top 4 Reasons for Divorce, According to Research

The Top Reasons For Divorce: Why Marriages Fail After 5 Years

5 Common Reasons Couples Divorce – LaFevor & Slaughter

3. How common is divorce and what are the reasons?

The Cause of Divorce among Men and Women

The nine most common reasons couples get divorced

How to stay married, according to a divorce lawyer

Causes and Associated Features of Divorce as Seen by experts

The funny thing is – when couples got into marital problems, and one partner wants to leave to test something new or maybe better, then irreconcilable differences comes in between. Inadvertently, its only a game plan to formally divorce and discharge the other partner while deep inside he/she is really very happy to finalize the divorce and separation and be free again.

In conclusion, perfect strangers should be left alone to discover each other, learn about each other, play with each other, fall in love with each other before saying I do with each other. Forcing a man or woman to love and marry with a perfect stranger is suicidal and such marriage fails even before it gets started.

No matter how couples try to pretend, Sex is the most important key that holds marriages together. When it lacks, the result is a troubled relationship and eventually a broken marriage that paves the way for divorce and separation. To have a sustainable love and happy relationship, couples must device a means to keep each other satisfied sexually, if not, that marriage is doomed to failure.

Relationship advice – Love is not blind, only the lovers are blindfolded. Save your marriage. If your still single, get to know each other well enough before even contemplating of saying I Do and getting married.

Share your expert opinion on this to help alleviate the problems of millions of people out there still trapped in a bad romance.

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Healthy Love Hate Relationship

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As we busy ourselves finding free stuff/freebies, we tend to forget the most important freebie of all times – Free Love – Healthy Love Relationships. What is Healthy Love Relationships and Healthy Love-Hate Relationships? How do we define and differentiate them? The word love can have a variety of related but distinct meanings in different contexts. Many other languages use multiple words to express some of the different concepts that English relies mainly on love to encapsulate; Cultural differences in conceptualizing love thus doubly impede the establishment of a universal definition. Although the nature or essence of love is a subject of frequent debate, different aspects of the word can be clarified by determining what isn’t love.

Love as a general expression of positive sentiment is commonly contrasted with hate; as a less sexual and more emotionally intimate form of romantic attachment, love is commonly contrasted with lust; and as an interpersonal relationship with romantic overtones, love is sometimes contrasted with friendship, although the word love is often applied to close friendships. Love refers to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes that ranges from interpersonal affection to pleasure. It can refer to an emotion of a strong attraction and personal attachment. It can also be a virtue representing human kindness, compassion, and affection. It may also describe compassionate and affectionate actions towards other humans, one’s self or animals.  Love in its various forms acts as a major facilitator of interpersonal relationships and, owing to its central psychological importance, is one of the most common themes in the creative arts. Love may be understood as a function to keep human beings together against menaces and to facilitate the continuation of the species.

A couple in love in the sunset on the beach

What is a Love-Hate Relationship?

A love–hate relationship is an interpersonal relationship involving simultaneous or alternating emotions of love and hate—something particularly common when emotions are intense. The term is used frequently in psychology, popular writing and journalism. It can be applied to relationships with inanimate objects, or even concepts, as well as those of a romantic nature or between siblings and parents/children. A love–hate relationship has been linked to the occurrence of emotional ambivalence in early childhood; to conflicting responses by different ego states within the same person; or to the inevitable co-existence of egoistic conflicts with the object of love.



The term is sometimes employed by writers to refer to relationships between celebrity couples who have been divorced, then who reunite, as well as to their relationship with fame itself. A love–hate relationship may develop when people have completely lost the intimacy within a loving relationship, yet still retain some passion for, or perhaps some commitment to, each other, before degenerating into a hate-love relationship leading to divorce.

Free Love

The term free love has been used to describe a social movement that rejects marriage, which is seen as a form of social bondage. The Free Love movement’s initial goal was to separate the state from sexual matters such as marriage, birth control, and adultery. It claimed that such issues were the concern of the people involved, and no one else. Many people in the early 19th century believed that marriage was an important aspect of life to fulfill earthly human happiness.

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Some Love Quotes From Famous Authors

a. Love is patient while relationship is an important thing to stay on the limelight of struggles until it slowly fades. Is serious love applicable nowadays or not? By all accounts, you can understand the facts of life. But facts of love are much different.

b. Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.

c. Love does not die easily. It is a living thing. It thrives in the face of all life’s hazards.

d. As you continue to send out love, the energy returns to you in a regenerating spiral… As love accumulates, it keeps your system in balance and harmony. Love is the tool, and more love is the end product.

e. Love is the best medicine, and there is more than enough to go around once you open your heart.

f. The most wonderful of all things in life, I believe, is the discovery of another human being with whom one’s relationship has a glowing depth, beauty, and joy as the years increase. This inner progressiveness of love between two human beings is a most marvelous thing, it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of Divine accident.

g. An intimate relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship. The term is sometimes used euphemistically for a sexual relationship, although the term is not exclusively sexual and can also be used to describe asexual relationships. Intimate relationships play a central role in the overall human experience. Humans have a universal want to belong and to love which is satisfied within an intimate relationship.

h. Intimate relationships consist of the people that we are attracted to, whom we like and love, romantic and sexual relationships, and those whom we marry and provide and receive emotional and personal support from.

i. Intimate relationships provide people with a social network of people that provide strong emotional attachments and fulfill our universal need of belonging and the need to be cared for.

j. For in the end, we will conserve only what we love. We will love only what we understand. We will understand only what we are taught.

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It is best to know the weaknesses of your partner so that it is easier for you also to comprehend and interact with each other despite flimsiness and immaturity of a relationship. The lovers must treat with each other equally in spite of individual differences. If you have a delusion of grandeur in your relationship, then it is wise to reconsider the scheme that results in equal rights and responsibilities.

Pride is the worst egoistic enemy in any relationship and the key to defeat this enemy is to communicate thoroughly and properly in order to patch up personal differences at once.

In an intimate relationship, it is Best to know the weaknesses of your partner. Feel free to share your thoughts.

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20 Best Sites To Learn How To Have A Blind Date

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Blind date? You must be joking; Are you kidding me? those are the first questions and expressions that comes to mind when some people hear the word – blind date. How to have a blind date. So what is blind date by the way? Here is a quick answer from a home boy – Its just meeting a new friend that you have not actually seen face to face nor seen in photos with your both eyes closed, says the street home boy on hearing that word for the first time. However, the guy was some how right at the beginning – Blind date is meeting a new friend that you have not actually seen face to face nor seen in photos, but only communicating through emails and text messages but with your eyes wide open. Its often exciting to see the person you have been talking and chatting with online face to face at a public place.

With the high number of people turning to online dating, blind date is gaining much attention as some people prefer the excitement of meeting a perfect stranger after chatting on the blind date site and talking on phone. However, there are prose and cons associated with blind date of which you must have to follow if you wish to have a successful first meeting or rather a blind date.

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Successful Blind Date



a. Before you arrange to meet each other face-to-face, make sure you’ve checked him or her by telephone or by test messages as people can easily be what they are not. You want to find out his/her information to determine not only what kind of person he/she is, but also whether you have things in common to share on your first blind date.

b. Description: Both of you must have to describe each other well enough on how you’ll recognize one another. Things like – color of shirt, eye glasses, common location, etc. Good description of your date makes things simple and funny until you actually meet and exchange the first hello and hand shake.

c. Meeting Place: At first meeting, try to keep things casual and make sure your meeting at a public place – with your pepper spray hidden in your hand bag ready for use (ladies) ..just kidding but ugly things can happen especially when meeting a stranger on a blind date for the first time.

d. Bills: Its highly recommended to insist of splitting the bill. At least make the offer to show that you’re considerate and like to keep things on equal terms and not a potential liability.

e. Transportation: Don’t ever propose or accept to be picked up or dropped at your place. Keep in mind that both of you are still perfect strangers therefore, meeting at a neutral ground would be cool until you get to know each other.

f. Introduction: On your first blind date, Don’t reveal too much about your self. Keep the really personal details to yourself and talk about general issues. Just be yourself and do not overdo things as both of you are still sizing up and weighing each other.
Don’t try to over-impress with exaggerations. If both of you are really meant for each other, everything will just connect instantly even on the fist blind date.

g. Distractions: Turn off your cell phone and be modest – good etiquette for any first blind date and rather normal dates.

h. Honesty: Don’t lie about your age, education, or anything as that would come back to hunt you later if you like each other and the relationship proceeds further. Some blind dates ends even before before finally meeting each other face to face.

i. Disappointment: If your disappointed and did not like what you saw and instantly decided after the first hello and handshake that you can’t spend another minute on the date, opt out as honestly as possible without hurting your new friend’s feelings.

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In other words, don’t suddenly end the date with a blatantly bogus story about how you suddenly realized you have to pick up your mother or father from the airport. Instead try to be more natural and friendly by saying, “Well it’s been nice meeting you, but I really need to get home as its getting too late.”

So there you have it – a successful or disappointed blind date, meeting face to face with the perfect stranger you have been emailing and chatting online all those months.

Always remember the saying – “A perfect stranger is only a friend in waiting”. Feel free to share your thoughts. Here’s 20 best sites to get blind dates tips.

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RELATED:

1.13 Blind Dating Tips for a Happy Blind Date – Lovepanky

2.How to Have a Successful Blind Date: 5 Steps (with Pictures)

3.How To Blind Date – Successful Blind Date – Cosmopolitan

4.Blind date do’s and don’ts | Happen Magazine

5.10 Ways to Have an Awesome Blind Date

6.7 Must-Know Tips for Going on a Blind Date

7.How to Make It (or Fake It) on a Blind Date | Fox News 

8.Blind Dates | Dating for Beginners

9.Simple Tips For Successful Blind Dates | YourTango

10.10 Things Women Should Do On A First Date

11.Blind Date #474: How I Met My Husband After Only 22 

12.Would You Go On a Crazy Blind Date? OK Cupid Thinks So

13.5 Tips to Make a Blind Date Go More Smoothly – Shape

14.More Than 50 Ways to Get Rid of Blind Dates – Lenny Zeltser

15.How To Have A Great Blind Date

16.How Do I Start Blind Date? – GameFAQs

17.How Facebook Could Sabotage Your Blind Date | TIME

18.What we’ve learned from five years of blind dates

19.How to Have a Blind Date That Doesn’t Suck

20.What to Wear on Outings in Manhattan with a Blind Date – WSJ

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